


Temporary Insanity

by grrriliketigers



Series: The Temporary Series [2]
Category: The Closer
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-15
Updated: 2013-04-16
Packaged: 2017-12-08 15:03:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/762753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grrriliketigers/pseuds/grrriliketigers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Follow-up to Temporary Blindness. Brenda takes Sharon home with her. They both have to deal with chain reactions set in motion by the lockdown of the court house.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Sharon sat in passenger seat of Brenda’s Acura sobering up. She hadn’t had the presence of mind to ask Brenda if she was okay to drive but Brenda hadn’t had as much as Sharon had. 

Sharon had had two Long Islands while Brenda nursed a Sea Breeze while trying to convince her parents not to hop on the next flight out. Once they stepped out into the cool of the night Sharon felt her wits returning. 

“Captain, I’d like to take you home with me.” Before Sharon could object, Brenda continued, “I don’t like the idea of you getting in a cab this late at night without being able to see completely.”

Sharon was too tired to be too proud and she’d accepted the offer. 

Brenda pulled the Acura into the driveway and let them into the house. She threw her purse under the table and the keys in a dish on top of the table. Sharon thought that Brenda’s house looked like a bachelor pad with scattered candy wrappers instead of beer cans. 

“Sorry about the mess. I haven’t been home much recently.” Brenda quickly picked up sweaters and candy and files from the living room and dumped them on her bed and came back in. “Glass of wine?” 

Sharon nodded, “sure.” 

Brenda uncorked a new bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon and poured two glasses. Sharon leaned back in the couch as Brenda joined her; she sipped her wine and felt the heat rising in her cheeks immediately. 

“You can take your jacket off if you’re hot,” Brenda offered, seeing the skin reddening around Sharon’s face and neck. 

Sharon shrugged out of her pinstripe jacket, folded it and set it aside on the couch. 

Brenda leaned forward and touched Sharon’s back just above her tank top where the rounded top of a tattoo protruded slightly. Sharon shivered under the touch, trying to remember exactly how long it had been since she’d been touched so gently. “You have a tattoo.”

“Oh.” Sharon said as if it were news to her, “yeah… I was in my twenties…” 

“I didn’t figure you for the secret tattoo type.” Brenda said, mesmerized by what she could see, mentally devouring the idea of Sharon and mystery tattoos. “What’s it of?” 

“It’s the Navy emblem.” Sharon admitted. 

“Why the Navy emblem?” 

“Well, it would have been silly for a Naval officer to get the Army’s emblem tattooed on her back, wouldn’t it?” Sharon snorted. 

“You were in the Navy?” 

“You’re a _detective_?” 

“Don’t be smart.” Brenda reprimanded. “Tell me about the Navy.” 

“Must I?” 

“Can I see the tattoo?” 

Brenda held Sharon’s gaze for a few long silent moments. Sharon took another sip of her wine and set it on the coffee table, “only because you plied me with alcohol first.” She grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head and set it aside.

She turned her back to Brenda. Brenda traced the circular emblem with her finger. It was cut in half by her black lace bra but the skin underneath her fingers was warm and soft. Brenda found herself wanting to press against Sharon Raydor, to feel the heat emanating from her body. 

One hand splayed over Sharon’s back, the other hand snaked around her waist, slowly she lowered her lips to Sharon’s shoulder. Sharon pulled in a breath and held very still as Brenda’s lips moved up to her neck. 

Sharon tilted her head to the side to provide easier access and gave a moan of pleasure when Brenda sucked gently behind her ear. Sharon turned in Brenda’s arms and slipped her fingers into Brenda’s blond waves. Their lips touched tentatively, their aching jaws cringing at the effort but their ardor grew stronger. 

When their tongues grazed each other for the first time Brenda let out a soft moan that sent a shock of arousal through Sharon. Suddenly her skin was alight and all she wanted to do was get out of her clothes and feel Brenda’s skin against her own. 

Brenda’s arms wrapped around Sharon and unsnapped her bra, as if reading her mind. Sharon’s breasts fell into view. Sharon was much better endowed than Brenda and as Brenda palmed the breasts she was surprised by their weight. 

Sharon whimpered and pushed her breasts into Brenda’s hands. Brenda kneaded the skin, aroused by the brunette’s obvious desire. Brenda’s heart pounded in her chest, as much as she wanted to acquiesce she was just as nervous that she wouldn’t be able to sate her. Brenda’s thumb brushed over a hardening nipple. 

Sharon gasped and gripped Brenda’s forearm tightly. 

Brenda felt wetness pool between her thighs as Sharon’s body quivered, begging for contact. Brenda dipped her head and ran her tongue over one of Sharon’s taut nipples. Sharon moaned and let her head loll back. Brenda was spurred on to wrap her lips around the bud and suck gently. 

Sharon’s fingers slipped into Brenda’s tresses and held her head in place as she laved Sharon’s nipple. Brenda’s hesitation and shyness faded as she sucked harder and with more tenacity. 

Sharon’s breath was coming in ragged gasps and moans now and Brenda switched to the other breast, her thumb and forefinger replacing her mouth as she shifted her attentions. Sharon’s fingernails raked along Brenda’s scalp as Brenda swirled her tongue around the nipple. 

Suddenly Sharon’s body gave a shudder and Brenda pulled back, afraid that she’d hurt her. Sharon squeezed her eyes shut, her head falling to Brenda’s shoulder, her body spasming as she groaned and whimpered. 

“Captain?” Brenda whispered with concern. 

“It’s been so long…” Sharon admitted, lifting her head and reaching up to wipe at her wet eyes. 

“Are you crying?” 

Sharon shook her head, “no. Coming always makes my eyes water.” 

“You just came? Just from… I didn’t even touch you…” 

Sharon laughed a little. “It was enough.” A flush came to her cheeks. “My nipples have always been very sensitive.” 

“I’ll say.” Brenda wrapped her arms around Sharon’s shoulders and pulled her in for a deep kiss. She started to lean back and pull Sharon with her until Sharon was straddling her. 

The broke apart and Sharon sat up, looking down at Brenda, whose eyes had darkened with desire. “I’m going to need more _traditional_ stimulation.” She said pointedly, glancing in the direction of her crotch. 

Sharon leaned close as she worked the buttons of Brenda’s sweater and blouse. “Only if you can say it,” she whispered, “say it for me.” 

Brenda bit her lip. “I want you to… you know…”

“No, I don’t know, Chief…” Sharon teased. 

“Oh, for heaven’s sake, just _fuck_ me, Captain. That is an order!” Brenda practically shouted, the sexual frustration coming to a head as Sharon pushed up Brenda’s skirt and buried her face between her legs. “ _Oh my **god**_.” Brenda cried, Sharon’s tongue lashing already causing Brenda’s teeth to clench with the intensity of the pleasure. 

Sharon’s head bobbed between her legs and just as Brenda thought she was going to explode… Sharon slowed to a stop. Brenda weakly lifted her head and whimpered, wondering why on _Earth_ she’d stop. 

Gently at first, Sharon probed Brenda’s opening. Brenda held her breath. Sharon pushed three fingers into her superior officer, setting a maddeningly slow rhythm. Brenda’s fingers started to clench around Sharon’s thick mane of silky hair and Sharon’s tongue started to slowly circle her clit again. 

Brenda’s orgasm was building again and she was out of breath as she lifted her body off of the couch, every inch of her yearning for Sharon. Brenda started murmuring her name as her body began to spasm. 

Sharon’s fingers curled inside of Brenda, moving against the sensitive tissue. Brenda’s vaginal walls clamped down onto the digits as Brenda’s climax continued to build. Brenda grit her teeth together almost fearing the orgasm that was about to burst through her. 

A powerful orgasm slammed into Brenda; she arched her back and cried out as every muscle in her body contracted and danced for Sharon. Sharon just continued her slow and steady ministrations which set off a second orgasm that raced through her to every extremity. 

Brenda’s chest heaved, her breathing shallow. Sharon slipped her fingers from Brenda and already Brenda missed the feeling of Sharon buried deep inside of her. 

Tears sprang to her eyes as she watched Sharon wipe her fingers off on a tissue. She let out a strangled sob and Sharon’s head snapped up, watching her with alarm. “…Chief…” she questioned tentatively. 

She’d never orgasmed that intensely before. Sex with Fritz had never been that good. No one had ever made her feel that way. 

“Coming makes my eyes water, too…” she lied, dragging the back of her hand across her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Brenda awoke with a groan, sunlight pouring into her living room and warming her face. The first thing she registered was the throbbing between her legs. She looked around for signs of Sharon to find that not only had she gone but she also cleared away her wine glass. 

Brenda picked up the remaining glass from the table, it was definitely hers it had her lipstick on it, and downed what was left. She pushed herself off of the couch – she never slept on the couch, it was horribly uncomfortable and her back muscles ached as she moved. 

She looked around the entryway and bathroom and was surprised, again, to find no trace of Sharon. 

Perhaps she’d just had a very vivid wet dream brought on by her gratitude toward Sharon. If that was the case, how much of the evening _had_ happened? 

After downing two cups of coffee she stepped into the shower. Her hand slipped between her legs, the arousal still pulsing through her body remembering the coupling. Her fingers trailed over something on her thigh and, spreading her legs, she craned to see what it was. 

It was a bite mark. 

So she had taken Sharon Raydor out for drinks, then they had returned to her house and she had let her sworn enemy give her the most intense orgasm she’d ever had. Sharon Raydor had done things to Brenda’s body she never even imagined were possible, she’d brought her to the brink and shoved her over the precipice. Seven hours later and Brenda’s body was still alight from Sharon’s skillful ministrations.

And she got up and left in the middle of the night. _Bitch_.

After showering quickly she picked up her phone and dialed Sharon’s number. It rang three times and then was dumped to voicemail. Brenda hung up. She didn’t know what it was exactly that she wanted to say to her. 

**

“Captain, thank you for coming in.” Police Chief Tommy Delk motioned to the seat in front of his desk. 

Sharon sat down and adjusted her new glasses so they weren’t resting too heavily against her bruised cheek. “My pleasure, Chief.” 

“I don’t know if you got a chance to watch the press conference,” he said and waited for her to acknowledge. 

She shook her head, “no, sir, I’ve had a busy morning.” She said truthfully. 

“Well, as you know, the LAPD hasn’t been written about very favorably these last few years and when it came about that Officer Faulkner and his ring were going to be indicted a lot of people lost some of their faith in their law enforcement.” Delk explained. He paused for affect before adding, “but you and your actions yesterday have gone a long way toward a restoration of faith in us. I want to thank you personally for that.” 

“Thank you, sir, just doing my job.” 

“Mayor Villaraigosa is very impressed and extremely grateful to you.” Delk continued, “which is why he’s giving you the key to the city. The ceremony will take place on Friday.”

“That’s quite an honor, sir, but I can’t accept that. I was just doing my job.” 

“It’s a gift, Sharon, don’t look it in the mouth.” Delk cautioned. “This is national recognition. Humility will only get you so far in this business. Any institution in the country would be a fool to turn down your transfer request.” 

“I haven’t applied for any transfers.” Sharon was quick to point out. “I’ve only talked to Tampa PD in an unofficial capacity.” 

“I don’t care in what capacity it was but the mayor has scheduled the ceremony for Friday and if you don’t show up it will reflect very poorly on you.”

Sharon was silent. 

Sharon and Delk had known each other for ten years and occasionally managed to have drinks and friendly dinners. The longer they sat in his office the more they felt like Sharon and Tommy instead of Captain Raydor and Chief Delk. 

Delk smiled, “Sharon, you’ve earned this.” She met his gaze but refrained from responding. “You’re always saying what a thankless job you have.” 

“Well, yes. FID is the most thankless job in the LAPD – apart from the janitorial staff, of course – but I don’t do it for thanks. I do it for justice.”

“And you deserve the key just for that.” He laughed, “not many people do this work for justice. It’s a moot point, anyway. The ceremony is scheduled for Friday.” 

Sharon rose from her chair, “I suppose I’ll see you then.” 

He snorted, “you’d better. Maybe your face will have cleared up by then.” He teased and then studied her for a moment, “you look tired.” 

“I had a long night.” 

He tapped his cheek, indicating he was referring to the bruising on her cheek, “steak. That should clear right up.” 

**

As more time passed, Brenda grew first frustrated and then angry at Sharon for leaving _and_ refusing to pick up the phone. As each day went by she wondered if she’d exaggerated the quality of the orgasm and when Friday rolled around she was ready to believe that it was a perfectly ordinary orgasm that just happened at a particularly vulnerable time. 

Sharon Raydor was still a jerk. She was still impossible to work with and pig headedly stubborn. She was still Brenda’s arch nemesis and all was right with the world. 

Sanchez walked by her and she held up a hand to catch his attention. “What are you doing with that file, detective?”

“I was going to bring it down to FID, Chief.” The people of Brenda’s department dared not speak the name of _that woman_ if at all avoidable. 

Brenda held out her hand, “I’ll take that.” When her request was met with skepticism, she added, “you _do_ have other work to do. Do you not?”

Out of the corner of his eye he glanced at Provenza who looked equally worried, finally Sanchez laid the file in Brenda’s outstretched hand. “Yes, Chief.” 

Walking down the hallway towards Sharon’s office Brenda was unsure how she’d speak to her when she saw her. Contemptuously. Angrily. Passive aggressively. It was anyone’s game, at this point. 

Sharon was seated at her desk, Brenda could see her through the glass door. Sharon was leaning her head against her hand and her elbow leaned on the desktop. Her brown waves cascaded in front of her as she wrote in the file in front of her. 

Brenda knocked lightly on the door frame. Sharon glanced up but didn’t make any move to get up. “How can I help you, Chief?” 

“Well, maybe you can start by apologizing to me for being _so rude_ and then we’ll figure out where to go from there.” 

Sharon watched Brenda’s face for a moment and then pursed her lips in annoyance – which only served to further annoy Brenda. “I am your superior officer!” 

“And you can’t treat me any differently because of what happened. Would you like to quote the handbook?” Sharon gestured to the book, open and laying face down on the desk beside her. 

“Don’t you dare.” Brenda warned, hating Sharon’s staunch rule book approach to everything. “You should pick up the phone. You don’t know it wasn’t work related.” 

Sharon tilted her head slightly at that. Brenda felt a blush rising in her cheeks, she could feel Sharon in her head, gathering and reading her thoughts. “You would have left a message. And, as I felt we had nothing to discuss, I simply chose to ignore the communication. That’s an alien concept, I’m sure, you’ve never ignored my phone calls during one of our cases so I’ll forgive you for not understanding.” 

“You can play it like we were drunk… but I know I wasn’t and I don’t think you were either.” Brenda said, forging ahead, ignoring Sharon’s jab. “And I think we should talk about this.” 

Sharon’s resolve was starting to crack, Brenda could see it, but she was fighting it with everything she had. Brenda found herself longing to see an emotion from Sharon that wasn’t indifference or contempt. She’d seen glimpses into Sharon during the courthouse lockdown but since then Sharon had diligently rebuilt the wall and Brenda was currently banging her head against it. 

There was a knock on the door which startled Brenda. Sharon did little more than flinch but she sat up straighter in her seat and looked a little more alert. “Come in,” she called. 

Brenda was about to turn around and tell whatever subordinate officer who dared to interrupt this meeting to hit the road while they could still walk and instead her eyes fell on an older gentleman in an Admiral’s uniform holding his hat beneath one arm. 

Brenda whipped around to look at Sharon when she heard her chair push out suddenly. Sharon was statue still with practiced ease, frozen in a salute. 

“At ease, Captain.” The admiral gave a microscopic smile and Sharon relaxed. 

“It’s good to see you, sir.” Sharon returned the almost non-existent smile. Despite it’s reservedness Sharon’s face lit up with it. 

“And you.” He nodded, still ‘smiling.’ 

“I’d like to introduce you to Deputy Chief Johnson.” Sharon motioned to Brenda. Brenda blinked in surprise. 

He held out his hand to shake hers, “Admiral Andrew Raydor.” 

“ _Raydor_.” Brenda repeated, shaking his hand in a trance, “so you’re…”

“Sharon’s father, yes.” He nodded. 

“That’s… wow.” Brenda stuttered. She had never before considered Sharon to be of human borne but as she shook Andrew Raydor’s hand she had to confront the reality. There was very little resemblance between the two except the sparkling green eyes. “It’s wonderful to meet you.” 

“Deputy Chief Johnson, you were at the courthouse as well, correct?” 

Brenda nodded. “Correct.” Brenda had a flashback to Sharon meeting Brenda’s parents and she’d remembered how uncomfortable the brunette had been when Clay clasped her hand tightly in both of his, smiling. Brenda was uncomfortable now. Where Clay and Willie Rae were warm, affectionate and sometimes boisterous, Andrew Raydor epitomized _understated_. 

“What brings you?” Sharon asked, mercifully rescuing Brenda from her stuttering. 

“You thought just because you didn’t tell me about the ceremony yourself that I would miss it?” His eye twinkled and Brenda saw Sharon in that as well. Sharon sighed inwardly and gave a half-hearted shrug. “More specifically, though, Captain, I am here right now because I would like to treat you to lunch.” 

“Thank you, sir.” Sharon nodded. 

“Deputy Chief Johnson, if you’d like to join us…” 

“Thank you for the invitation, but I’m afraid I’m swamped with work.” Brenda gripped the folder in her hand, remembering she had it for the first time since the Admiral stepped foot into the office. 

Sharon looked over at the folder. “Sir, may I meet you in the outer office in just a minute. I think Chief Johnson needs to speak with me.” 

Had Sharon just read her mind? Surely not, if she could read her mind she’d have been blushing. 

“Of course.” He gave a tiny smile, a curt nod and left the office. 

Brenda turned to look at Sharon. Sharon held her gaze and smirked at her, “ _‘just… wow’_?” Sharon snorted, “you’re not going to hit on my father, are you?”

“What?” Brenda’s mouth fell open, “no. If you must know, I came down here to hit on _you_ but I don’t much feel like it anymore.” 

“For the best, I’m sure.” Sharon smirked again, “is that file actually for me?”

Brenda blustered and handed it to her. “Sanchez pulled up Faulkner’s known associates.” There was silence for a moment as Sharon flipped through the file. “Your father calls you Captain?”

“I earned it. It’s a sign of respect.” 

“You’ve been ignoring my calls all week.” Brenda said then, her voice level. 

“Because it was a _mistake_. It shouldn’t have happened. And I don’t feel it’s necessary to keep rehashing it.” 

“I couldn’t agree more, Captain, and if you’d just picked up your phone you’d know that already.” Brenda lied. “I just wanted to make sure you didn’t develop an unhealthy obsession for me. You know, make little shrines in your closet.” 

Sharon snorted, “definitely _not_.” 

“Good. Now that we’ve got that settled. Enjoy your lunch and enjoy your ceremony.”


	3. Chapter 3

“Are you seeing anyone?” Andrew asked as he set down his water glass. 

Sharon heaved a heavy sigh. “This again?” 

“I ask because there was a young man that I worked with for several months on the base. He’s very intelligent, a systems analyst. He’s moving to Los Angeles in October and I think you should-” 

“I mean it.” Sharon pursed her lips, “ _stop_ trying to set me up.” 

“My first set up worked so well, I think you’d trust me.” 

“Of course I trust you…” Sharon paused to tread lightly through her next sentence. “I just… Derek was perfect, we had a lot of good years and I remain forever grateful to you for introducing us. I’m just sensitive about it, it’s still a very open wound.” 

“It’s been twenty years, Sharon.” 

“I never ask you why you never remarried after mom died.” Sharon said softly. 

“Men are different, we’re lone wolves. Women need companionship.” 

“Sir, no disrespect intended, but you don’t know much about people if you believe that.” Sharon scoffed. “I’m happy, can’t you leave it be?” 

“I need to know you’re taken care of.” Andrew admitted. 

“I don’t _need_ to be taken care of.” Sharon snapped. Andrew stared at her and Sharon let out a silent sigh and reeled herself back in. “Sir, I find that offensive. You would _never_ say that to Phillip or Jaime.”

“It’s because-” he started and she finished with him, “they’re men.” 

He put a hand on his hip, “yes, Captain, because they’re men. Whether you want to believe it or not it is a man’s world and you’re not going to change it just because you refuse to date. Women need a man.” 

“I don’t want to get into this, sir.” Sharon grabbed her water glass to keep her hand from shaking. “Can we please drop it?”

“So you admit that I’m right.” Andrew didn’t pose it as a question. He watched her with keen eyes, daring her to disagree. 

“Sure.” Sharon said with resignation. 

**

Brenda side stepped down one of the rows of chairs in the first couple of rows that had been reserved for LAPD and took a seat next to Sergeant Gabriel. “I was beginning to think you weren’t coming, Chief.” He whispered. 

“I almost didn’t.” Brenda admitted. 

Sharon was already seated on the stage next to Tommy Delk. Seeing her made Brenda feel a little sick to her stomach with regret and disappointment that Sharon had shot her down. Brenda didn’t know what to feel about the abrupt end to any potential they had, she felt that it would have been only fair if she’d been involved in the discussion. 

“You should be up there, too, Chief.” Lieutenant Provenza leaned in between Brenda and Gabriel from the row behind them. 

“I don’t want to be up there.” Brenda shrugged, “I was mostly just along for the ride.” 

“Yeah, how quickly you and everyone else forgets that you shot that whack job with the bomb and the manifesto saving thousands of people. She gets a commendation and you lose your chances for being Chief.” Flynn said from behind her on her other side. “It ain’t right, Chief.” 

“Lieutenant, will you please _hush_?” Brenda hissed, pursing her lips. Scattered exclamations by members of the press and rapid fire shutter clicks suddenly erupted. Brenda turned to see Mayor Villaraigosa walked across the stage and stood at the podium. 

He had to lower the microphone to speak into it and he cleared his throat. The audience was silent except for the occasional straggling camera flash. “Thank you all for coming out today to help the city of Los Angeles pay homage to one of LA’s finest. Monday’s events are still vivid in my mind, as I’m sure they are for many of you. When I got the call that the courthouse was held hostage I knew that action needed to be taken and hard choices needed to be made. The courthouse, essentially, was a stronghold and people could neither get in nor get out and that tied my hands and the hands of the LAPD officers outside. I along with all of Los Angeles had to watch and wait as hours ticked by hoping for a miracle. Captain Sharon Raydor was that miracle.” Villaraigosa concluded and the crowd applauded thunderously. 

Sharon crossed her legs on the other side cursing Villaraigosa and his flare for the over dramatic. She smiled the obligatory smile though the saccharine words made her want to roll her eyes. Tommy Delk, though his gaze was on the mayor, watched Sharon out of the corner of his eye. 

“I owe Captain Sharon Raydor a debt of gratitude as do we all. Before I present the key to her today I’ve asked her father, Admiral Emeritus Andrew Raydor to say a few words.” He stepped back from the podium as Andrew strode onto the stage. 

Sharon sat straighter in her chair, stunned that he hadn’t mentioned he’d be delivering a speech. 

Andrew shook Villaraigosa’s hand as they passed and Brenda was surprised to see how much taller and more imposing he was than the mayor. Andrew stood in front of the podium with the dignified posture of a military man and withdrew a folded piece of paper from the pocket of his uniform. “My daughter has never been the type of person to back down from a challenge or let any obstacle stand in her way,” he began. 

In her seat Brenda nodded an amen to that. 

“When she told me she wanted to join the Navy I told her that I didn’t think she should. It turned out she wasn’t asking me for my advice because she joined up the next day. She rose quickly through the ranks because she was fierce and competent and ready for any challenge.” 

_Competent_. Brenda repeated in her head, what a ringing endorsement…

“Sharon has always known what it is that needs to be done. She does not ask questions, she does her duty and those are the marks of a superior officer. When I heard about Sharon’s actions on Monday surprise was the furthest thing from my mind, I was overcome with pride. I couldn’t ask for a better daughter and Los Angeles couldn’t ask for a better Captain.” 

Brenda thought that the Admiral’s speech had sounded more like an employer’s letter of reference than a proud papa but she saw Sharon discreetly wipe her left eye under her glasses. At least Sharon had appreciated it. 

Sharon stood and the two Raydors saluted each other respectively. There was a beat when Villaraigosa didn’t move and the Raydors stepped toward each other and hugged tentatively. This seemed to mollify the mayor and he shook Andrew’s hand before turning to shake Sharon’s. 

Andrew sat in the chair vacated by Sharon. Delk, still watching the seat out of the corner of his eye, finally wondered then why Sharon hadn’t ever talked about her parents, he’d thought she was an orphan. 

Villaraigosa shook Sharon’s hand vigorously, turning to the sudden onslaught of flashing cameras as the plaque with the mounted key passed from him to her. Sharon’s hand moved to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear before the mayor leaned close and said something into her ear. She nodded with a smile and stepped up to the podium. 

Brenda was mesmerized. 

“I am… humbled by this great honor,” Sharon said slowly, holding the plaque in both hands in front of her on the podium. She glanced down at it and Brenda thought that she was choking in front of such a large audience. 

Sharon cleared her throat. “As an Officer of the LAPD my job is to protect this city and its citizens. I know that there have been a lot of things recently that may have shed an unfavorable light on our institution but I want you to know that I take my job very seriously and as an Internal Affairs officer my first priority is to make sure that the LAPD works _for you_. I took an oath to protect and serve and in that courthouse I was doing exactly as I promised I’d do and I will continue to do that. My priority is to protect and serve this city.” There was a pause for a second and she smiled a little, holding up the plaque. “Next time a thank you will do.” 

**

After the ceremony ended and Sharon was threatened into a photoshoot by Delk she managed to slip out of the crowd and she made it all the way to her car, keys in hand, civvies in sight and a pair of hands slipped over her eyes. 

“Guess who.” 

She snorted a laugh and pushed the hands away, “I’d recognize those hairy palms anywhere,” she turned and hugged the man, “Smitty, what are you doing here?”

“Your old man told me about the ceremony thought I might like to come out and see it. Give us a chance to catch up.” He looked her over, “you look funny in that police uniform. I’m not the only one who thinks so.” 

Sharon punched him in the shoulder, “you and the admiral, right? Yeah, well, I like it. I like the police department, the police department likes me…” she smirked, “sort of.” 

“Come on, Shark, we’re going out and we’re gonna get shitfaced.” He took her by the arm. 

“Hold on, hold on.” Sharon shook her head with a laugh, “we’re not twenty anymore. Hell, our _kids_ aren’t twenty anymore.” 

“Don’t tell me you’ve gone soft on me just because you left us.” 

“I didn’t leave you!” Sharon snapped. “I left the _Navy_. Neither you nor my father are going to make me feel bad about that anymore.”

“Hey, come on, I’m not trying to make you feel bad.” Smitty said earnestly, “let’s go out. I wanna take you out. It’s been fifteen years since I seen you. Come on. What are old friends for except to get a little wasted sometimes.” 

“Okay, fine, let me just grab a different shirt.” Sharon unbuttoned and pulled off her police jacket, revealing the white t-shirt underneath. She was about to open the trunk to get to her change of clothes. 

“Hang on, I’ve got this.” He held up a gray sweatshirt with Navy printed on the front in blue. 

She snatched it from him, “smartass.” 

**

“Hey, Chief, you still here?” Lieutenant Flynn appeared in her doorway. “What are you doing?”

Brenda looked up, she knew it was an honest question. They had no open cases and Delk had given Major Crimes the day off considering Brenda had been an integral part of the courthouse lockdown. 

“Just taking the opportunity to finish up some paperwork…” Brenda shrugged. It was partially true. 

Flynn nodded, he knew what it was like going through a separation which 99.9% of the time led to divorce. He knew not to push. He tapped the doorframe, “well, have a good evening, Chief. Call me if you need anything.”

“Thank you, Lieutenant.” Brenda waited as he left before she sighed and dropped her glasses to the desktop. She rubbed her eyes and contemplated her next move. 

She decided that she needed a drink. Rejected by Fritz and, to add insult to injury, rejected by Captain Sharon Raydor. She needed a very stiff drink. 

She recalled that there was a bar just down the street from the LAPD, it was a cop bar. She preferred cop bars because she didn’t get hit on as much and she wasn’t in the mood for some sleaze to drape himself all over her trying to buy her her next glass of wine. 

When she entered there was a ruccus in the corner that she ignored and walked up to the bar. “Give me a red Zin.” 

He laid a square white napkin in front of her. She touched the corners and straightened it. He returned with a glass of the dark red wine. She sipped it and let the smooth red slide down her throat. One thing was certain, Deputy Chief Brenda Leigh Johnson could always depend on a nice glass of red at the end of long day. 

Once she’d downed the first glass she called for another and then stood up to find a table to sit at and read. 

At the table in the corner Sharon, Smitty and a few officers from Sharon’s team just received another round of shots. “No, no.” Sharon shook her head, waving her hands, “no more for me.” 

“What? You gone soft on me, maggot?” Smitty demanded. 

“ _Maggot_?” Sharon repeated incredulously. “If you’ll recall I always outranked you. _You’re_ the maggot, _maggot_.”

“You gave up your rank when you dropped out, maggot, take the shot.” 

Sharon picked up the shot glass from the tray and lifted it but she hesitated when she locked eyes, improbably, with Brenda. Brenda stopped and stood staring at Sharon. Her gaze broke and looked away and when she turned back Sharon had returned her attention to her companions. 

Brenda took big gulps of air, suddenly feeling as though the wind had been knocked out of her she set her glass down and headed for the bathroom. She stood in front of the sink trying to catch her breath when the door opened. “Occupi-”

“Chief,” Sharon said slowly, closing the door and reaching up to latch the door. “Can we talk?”

“I think you made it pretty clear that we have nothing to talk about, Captain, now if you’ll excuse me? This _is_ a one person bathroom…” Brenda pursed her lips. 

“I don’t want this to effect our working relationship,” Sharon’s words were overly enunciated to counteract the slight slur she felt. 

“We don’t _have_ a working relationship. We can just go right back to hating each other, it’s been working pretty well for the last few years, why mess with perfection, hm?” 

“Because I don’t hate you, Chief. I think that you’re a very strong and courageous person. I think that you are admiral-admibal-ad… _shit_.”

“Admirable?” Brenda offered with a smirk.

“Yes.” Sharon smiled, “you’re that. Very much so. I think you’re a good person and you get jobs _done_ , you would have been a great Police Chief. Don’t get me wrong, Tommy’s my friend, but what grown man calls himself _Tommy_?” 

“You’re rambling, Captain.” 

“I always ramble when I’m nervous.” 

“Don’t you mean ‘drunk?’” 

Sharon shook her head, leaning in gently brushing her lips against Brenda’s. “No,” she whispered, “I always get nervous around people I’m attracted to.” 

Brenda grasped Sharon’s arms and pulled her in for a kiss. A little needling part of her kept trying to tell her how unethical it was to take advantage of the obviously drunk Captain, who apparently, as it turned out, was a horny drunk. 

But Brenda wanted it too damn bad. She wanted to feel Sharon’s body against her own, wanted to feel Sharon’s fingers pushing inside of her, wanted Sharon’s tongue explore her body. And damn the consequences. 

She could always claim that she’d been drunk too if ethics were ever brought up. Surely, Captain Raydor would never pursue a claim of sexual harrassment, she’d have to admit that she’d taken equal part – drunk or not. 

It was hard to weigh moral pros and cons when Sharon Raydor was bending down to grasp Brenda and hoist her up to the vanity counter. Brenda whimpered a soft, “yes…” 

Sharon’s lips peppered kisses and nips along Brenda’s neck, collarbone and jawline as her hands pushed Brenda’s skirt up around her waist. Brenda, doubting the older woman’s coordination somewhat, reached down and pulled off her underwear. 

Sharon’s movements slowed for a moment, her hands gently stroking Brenda’s face. Brenda’s hands covered Sharon’s and Brenda was overcome with emotion. How could Sharon look at her with such adoration when she was a complete bitch the rest of the time? How could Sharon look at her with a look of longing that she’d never seen on her husband? 

Their lips met again, the kiss deep and sensual. While Brenda was being distracted by the kiss, Sharon slipped her right hand away from the Chief’s cheek. She nudged her legs further apart with her body and her fingers found Brenda’s opening. 

Brenda gasped and bucked her hips, needing Sharon deep inside of her. When Sharon continued to tease her Brenda bucked her hips again, “please… please…” 

Sharon’s fingers plunged into Brenda. Brenda’s thighs held Sharon’s hips in a vice-like grip as one arm wrapped around Sharon’s neck and she used the other to brace herself against the wall. 

Sharon would pull her fingers back and twist them as they re-entered her superior officer. Brenda was borderline incoherent as she rocked her hips against Sharon’s ministrations, murmuring between moans. 

There was a knock on the door and Brenda leaned her head back and called, “occupied!” 

If Sharon had heard the knock she didn’t acknowledge it as she continued to thrust. Brenda slipped her eyes shut, her head lolling back as her orgasm built in the pit of her stomach. 

The knock came again and Brenda’s orgasm subsided. She let out a growl of frustration and yelled, “use the men’s!” 

Sharon used her free hand to pull Brenda in for a kiss and the knocker was all but forgotten. Sharon held their bodies together as she added another finger. Brenda grabbed a fistful of her sweatshirt as her orgasm ripped through her, her vision blackening for a moment until she collapsed back against the mirror. 

Sharon slowly pulled out and put her hands on either side of Brenda, leaning forward, chest heaving from the exertion. “Chief?”

Brenda lifted her head with considerable effort to meet Sharon’s gaze, “yes, Captain?”

“I’m drunk,” she whimpered, “will you take me home?”


	4. Chapter 4

Sharon and Brenda exited the bathroom together and Brenda met the glares of several women waiting for the bathroom. Brenda put an arm around Sharon and lied, “she’s just a little sick, she’ll be fine.” 

They walked back over to Sharon’s table, Sharon picked up her purse and slung it over her shoulder. “Smitty, I gotta go. Call you tomorrow?” Sharon asked apologetically. 

“Yeah… you okay to drive and everything?” Smitty asked, not that he’d have been able to offer her a ride in his condition. 

“Chief Johnson’s driving me home.” Sharon put an arm around Brenda. Brenda stiffened at the sudden contact, her body still recovering. 

“ _You_ okay to drive?” Smitty looked to Brenda. 

“Yes.” Brenda replied tersely. 

“Anything happens to the Shark and yer in trouble.” Smitty pointed at Brenda, vodka sloshing out of the shot glass he was holding. 

“She’ll be fine.” Brenda insisted, turning Sharon toward the exit. Once they were outside and the fresh air washed over them Brenda turned to look at her, “‘the Shark?’” 

“It’s what they called me in the Na-vy.” Sharon ran a hand through her hair, “god, I can’t hold my liquor anymore…” 

“Do you have your key?”

Sharon dug her keys out of the pocket of her uniform pants and jingled them in front of Brenda. “ _You’re_ driving, remember?”

“I meant your, you know, the key to the city.” 

“The admiral took it for me.” Sharon said as she waited by the door to the Acura, waiting for Brenda to unlock it. 

The two women got in and buckled up. Sharon leaned her head back against the headrest. “Why did they call you the Shark?” 

“Smitty said it’s because I can smell fear.” Sharon snorted and sighed, “but I’m really pretty sure it’s just because it shares the first three letters as my name…” 

“Why’d you leave the Navy?”

“I don’t want to talk about the Navy.” Sharon snapped, “why do you keep asking me about the Navy?”

“I want to know more about you.”

“ _Why_?” 

“Because I like you.” Brenda growled, “because… you’re a pain in the ass and a distraction and you’re stubborn. You’re all of those things because you’re really good at your job. If you weren’t all of those things you wouldn’t be such a good Internal Affairs agent. I respect that. And I _like_ you.” 

There was silence for several long minutes. “Thank you for driving me home.”

“You’re welcome.” Brenda kept her eyes straight ahead. 

Sharon’s head was still back against the headrest and she slipped her eyes closed. “Tell me something about you and I’ll tell you why I left the Navy.” 

“Okay…” Brenda paused to think, “when I was a rookie in Savannah I had an affair with Will Pope.” 

“Old news.” Sharon protested, “everyone knows that.” 

“I’m not finished.” Brenda insisted. “I thought I was in so much love. You know how that goes, in your twenties you think you’ve got everything figured out, everything your life’s going to be about.” 

Sharon’s eyes welled up behind her eyelids and she nodded. “Yeah.”

“Will told me how I was the love of his life and he was going to leave his wife when the time was right… I still can’t believe I was stupid enough to ever believe that… one day he just ended it and I was devestated. I was going to call him at his house and tell him what a jackass he was… and his wife answered the phone.” 

“What’d you do?” 

“I hung up. What could I do?” Brenda shrugged, “I think I did a lot of growing up in the forty-five seconds it took to make that call because I realized there was no reason to ruin what she had because I was mad. I got over Will pretty quickly after that… it was never about me and I knew that he had more growing up to do than I did… if I hadn’t realized that we wouldn’t have been able to work together anymore and he may never have offered me the job with Major Crimes. Sometimes I think everything happens for a reason. Whenever I feel mad or frustrated I just think of that, I believe there’s a plan. There’s an order of things.” 

Sharon shook her head, “I don’t. I believe the world is a chaotic place that is full of wild guesses and crap shoots. Sure I believe in statistics and probability but that’s just the measuring of the chaos, it’s not finding order in it.” Sharon lifted her head, “take war for example. War doesn’t make any damn sense. Battle plans and strategies, it’s a bunch of bullshit. It’s all politics and prejudices. I hate war.” 

“Is that why you left the Navy?” 

“More or less.” 

“Was there another reason?” Brenda asked, glancing at the Captain. 

“My husband was killed in Kuwait.” 

“I’m sorry,” Brenda said softly. 

Sharon shrugged, “you know how it is. In your twenties you think you’ve got everything figured out and you think you’re going to grow old with the man you love… one way or another the fantasy always ends.” 

Brenda nodded sympathetically. The rest of the car ride was spent in silence. 

Once Brenda pulled into Sharon’s driveway she asked, “shall I see you to the door?” 

“Why don’t you come in?” Sharon fiddled with her keys. “Please?” 

Brenda turned to look at Sharon, their eyes locked for a moment and Brenda nodded, “okay, why not?” She cut the engine and got out. 

Sharon let them into the house. The house was neat as a pin and stylishly decorated – it was a perfect extension of Sharon. Upon closer inspection Brenda realized that there were hardly any personal touches, the place may as well have been a showroom. 

Sharon led them into the kitchen which was even more beautiful than the living room. This room seemed to tell more about her than the living room. There was a wine rack underneath the counter near the refrigerator and there was a food splattered cookbook propped open near the flattop range. In the right side of the sink there was a skillet and a single place setting drying and sparkling in the overhead light. There were letters in an outbox on the corner of the counter. This room was clearly lived in. 

Brenda felt a sudden influx of cold air and she looked over to see that Sharon had opened the refrigerator and pulled out a ceramic canister and set about making coffee. 

Seeing few better options, Brenda took a seat at the kitchen island while Sharon busied herself. She tried to picture Sharon not alone, she tried to picture Sharon deliriously happy and it made her feel deeply sad that she couldn’t. 

At least Sharon looked content when she was busy. She’d seemed happy around Christmas when she thought she would be getting out of work, when she was thinking about seeing her kids. 

“Your kids.” Brenda said aloud. At first, startled by her own voice, she looked at Sharon with confusion. “You have children.” 

“Two boys.” 

“Don’t hold back, Sharon.” Brenda snorted. 

Sharon watched for a moment before quirking a small smile, “Phillip and Jaime, they’re twins.” 

“That must have been a trial.” Brenda’s eyes widened, “my brother drove my mother absolutely up the wall and there was only one of him.” 

Sharon smiled again, “my boys were very well behaved. Of course, being kids, they got into their fair share of trouble but they always owned up to it and they’ve always been very respectful.” Sharon glanced at Brenda, Brenda nodded for her to go on. “They’re both in the Navy, the admiral’s very proud. It’s a family hazzard. Jaime’s an enlisted but Phillip is a Navy attorney.”

“Like JAG?” 

Sharon nodded, “like JAG.” The coffee pot beeped and Sharon again busied herself and returned to the island. 

“You didn’t ask me how I take my coffee.” Brenda protested. 

Sharon pushed the mug closer to the blonde. “Skim milk and four sugars.” 

Brenda looked down at the mug in awe. “Well… I say four, but it’s really…”

“Five. I know.” Sharon sipped her own coffee. “I have a near perfect memory.” 

Brenda finally lifted the mug to her lips, “and you make a damn fine coffee.” There was silence for a moment. “Are you still drunk?”

“Significantly less so.” Sharon admitted, “just don’t ask me to pat my head and rub my stomach at the same time.” 

“I can’t do that sober!” Brenda laughed. 

“Well, Chief, that requires coordination.” Sharon grinned. 

“Oh yes… well darn.” Brenda let the amused chuckling die down before she set the mug down and steeled her courage to ask, “so, what happened in the bathroom… and before that in my living room…” 

“Yes… that…” Sharon looked down into her coffee. 

“I’m not really a love ‘em and leave ‘em type…” Brenda started, already afraid she was about to ramble, “I-I… well, I’m a respectable Georgia girl and I at least expect dinner… usually before sex but I can work with after…” 

“Are you asking me on a date, Chief?”

“ _No_. Obviously you weren’t listening, I’m asking you to ask _me_ on a date.” 

Sharon quirked an amuse smirk. “You’ve already decided I’m the man in this scenario, haven’t you?” 

“I will point out that I’m the only one who’s been penetrated… so I think that puts me in the _female_ role… do you disagree?” 

“Big deal, you sucked on my nipples. How many men have you made come by sucking on their nipples?” 

Brenda blushed, “well, admittedly, none, but I haven’t made any other women come that way… I’ve never made a woman come before you actually… I have been on dates with women, this isn’t coming out of nowhere. Do you? Do you usually date women?” 

“I… don’t really… _date_ …” Sharon started to trace the rim of her mug distractedly. “I haven’t been serious with anyone since Derek – my husband – and at this point I’m afraid I’m too old…” 

“Oh, shut-up. I don’t care how old you are in years you are an absolutely gorgeous woman, you’re smart, you’re brilliant and you’re _funny_ \-- just usually you’re throwing barbs at me and they aren’t really funny to me… but when you give it to Will, those are pretty funny.” 

“Would you like to stay the night?” 

“I ask you to ask me to dinner and you ask me to spend the night?” Brenda teased, “you’re a smooth operator, Sharon Raydor.” 

“Is that a no?”

Brenda shook her head, “no.” 

“May I kiss you?” 

Brenda blinked, “you’ve had your face buried between my legs and now you’re going to ask politely?” Brenda took Sharon’s hand and pulled her closer. “ _Yes_ you can kiss me.”


	5. Chapter 5

Sharon and Brenda finished their coffees and Sharon led Brenda up the stairs to her lofted bedroom. The bedroom was decorated much more personally. There were several pictures of her growing boys, a picture of Sharon, Andrew and the twins from the last Christmas and one discreet photograph of Sharon and Derek. 

Brenda found herself immediately drawn to the picture. Sharon turned to see that Brenda held that particular photograph in her hands and flinched. 

“It’s a cute picture.” Brenda said.

“Thanks.” Sharon sat down on the bed. 

“How old are you here?” 

“Thirty-two, it was our tenth anniversary.” Sharon held her hand out for the picture. Brenda handed it to her and Sharon put it in the drawer of the nightstand. “I don’t want to talk about my dead husband when I’ve asked someone to stay over.” 

“We could talk about it if you want.” Brenda sat next to her. 

“Nothing to talk about.” Sharon shook her head, “it was a long time ago. That war was twenty years and four presidents ago.” 

“Wait, did you leave the Navy before or after the war?”

“After.” 

“So, you’re a _veteran_. Were you ever over there?” 

“No. I wasn’t. Which is largely why I quit.” Sharon admitted. “They didn’t send me because I was a mother and they had no qualms about telling me so.” 

Brenda threaded her fingers through Sharon’s. “I really like this side of you. I like this sincerity.” 

Sharon smiled and leaned in to kiss Brenda’s lips softly. “Well, it’s because we’re both working toward a common goal now.” 

“Oh yeah? Which is?” 

Sharon lowered Brenda onto the plush comforter. “Getting you into bed.” 

“Mmm,” Brenda grinned as Sharon straddled her hips. Sharon leaned down and kissed along Brenda’s neck. Brenda brushed the hair away from Sharon’s ear and whispered, “for what it’s worth, I think you look great in your police uniform.” 

“Thanks, Chief.” 

The two women spent the rest of the evening kissing and touching and whispering to each other. Brenda realized that she’d fallen asleep when she was startled awake by the sound of a porcelain toilet seat colliding with the tank and heard Sharon retch. 

She listened for a moment, wondering if she should go in and offer assistance. The toilet flushed and the shower turned on. Brenda let her eyes flutter shut again. 

Sharon climbed back into bed after her shower and pressed her warm, damp body against Brenda’s back and wrapped her arms around her. 

The alarm clock went off at five. Sharon stretched and yawned and leaned over to kiss Brenda’s cheek before getting out of bed. Brenda groaned and pulled the sheets over her head letting out a muffled, “ _five in the morning?!_ ” 

Sharon started pulling on her stretch pants and a sports bra, “I’m going to go for a run, you’ll be okay here for a bit?” 

“I’ll be fine. I’ll be asleep. It’s _Saturday_.” Brenda chanced a glance outside of the covers and raised her eyebrows at the Captain’s running outfit. “That’s cute.” 

Sharon blushed and waved her off. She pulled her hair back and pulled on the Navy sweatshirt. She pulled on her sneakers and picked up her ipod. 

“What do you run to? Selections of drill sergeants telling you you’re worthless?” 

Sharon snorted, “Beethoven, Mozart and Chopin mostly.” 

“You’re ridiculous.” Brenda muttered with a smile pulling the covers back over her head. 

Brenda had drifted off to sleep again and was awoken by Sharon’s landline ringing. She rubbed her eyes and figured this time she was up. It was around 6:30 and she decided it could be worse, it was at least better than five. 

The phone stopped ringing and promptly started ringing again. 

Brenda furrowed her brow, “Sharon?” She called. She was surprised that she wasn’t back yet. Brenda got out of the bed and rubbed her eyes with a yawn. She decided that Sharon wouldn’t mind if she helped herself to a shower. 

She was still standing under the warm stream when the door to the bathroom opened, “Sharon?” Brenda asked, rubbing a hole in the condensation to look out. 

Sharon slid the door open, “hey,” she’d stripped naked. “Sleep well?” 

“Yeah… up until getting woken up at five.” Brenda smirked and Sharon stepped into the shower behind her. 

“Sorry about that. Didn’t get back to sleep?” Sharon’s hands circled Brenda’s waist and pulled her back against her body. 

“I did for a while…” Brenda trailed off, thinking. The feel of Sharon’s feminine curves pressed into her was intoxicating. “I know last night you said you didn’t want to talk about your husband when you were in bed with someone else and that probably extends to in the shower with someone else…” 

“Just ask.” Sharon sighed against Brenda’s hair, nuzzling her nose into the wet blond locks. 

“You said you haven’t really dated much… and you haven’t had anything serious since… I guess I have two questions: _is_ this a one night stand? And if not, what makes me different?” 

“Well, I’m not setting aside the rest of my life for you just yet.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.” 

Sharon frowned. “What do you want me to say? It would be pretty stupid of me to have a one night stand with a colleague and superior officer.”

Brenda shrugged, “not really. We’ve never gotten along at work, it wouldn’t really change anything. You’re still avoiding my question.” 

“I’m interested in you.” Sharon admitted, “I’m interested in who you are as a person and who I am when I’m around you. I’m interested to see how we could work together.” 

Brenda nodded, “I can live with that for now.” She turned around in Sharon’s arms and faced the older woman. “I’m not going to be as perfect as your memory of Derek. I’m putting that out there right now, don’t expect me to be. I’m probably going to make a lot of mistakes and I hope you have a big heart because one or two of them might be big. I’m not trying to make excuses for myself, I’m just telling you what history has taught me.” 

Sharon captured Brenda’s mouth with her own. “How about… I promise to take it one day at a time?” 

“Is today already comped?”

“What do you think?” Sharon whispered against her lips, “you think I’m standing here naked with you because I’m kicking you out?” 

“I don’t know…” Brenda shrugged, “I don’t know what the protocol is for a paramilitary navy officer turned police officer. It’s still before seven, maybe this still counts as yesterday.” 

“You know what? I’ll credit you three days. After that we’ll take it day by day.” Sharon nipped Brenda’s bottom lip, “how does that sound?”

“Well, I think I’d be a fool to turn that down,” Brenda slid her hands down Sharon’s body.


	6. Chapter 6

_“I’ve got it!” Jaime yelled as he leapt over the couch and ran to the front door. He flung it open to see Andrew standing there with his hat in his hand. “Hi grandpa!” Jaime grinned, his smile gapped like a jack-o-lantern._

_“Hey kiddo,” Andrew saluted him and Jaime saluted back._

_“Do you see? I lost another tooth.” He pointed to a new gap._

_“Oh wow. Your adult teeth are coming in like crazy! You’re going to be a man before we know it!” Andrew mustered up a smile._

_Sharon came in from the other room and sucked in a breath upon seeing her father. “Sir.”_

_“Commander.” He straightened. “Jaime, why don’t you run along? I have to discuss something with your mother.”_

_“Okay.” Jaime acquiesced, running off into the house._

_Father and daughter were silent for a few long minutes. “Sharon,” he started. She felt her chest tighten, he only called her Sharon when had something bad to tell her. “It’s about Derek.”_

_She felt the tears stinging her eyes but it was rage behind them instead of grief. “_ No! _” She shrieked._

_“Sharon, calm down, please. Think of the boys.” Andrew frowned._

_“That is easy enough for you to say now. Were you thinking of the boys when you sent him over there?” She demanded, “you look me in the eye and you tell me how it was in anybody’s best interest to send Derek over there.”_

_Andrew set his jaw and said nothing._

_“I didn’t think so.” She sneered. “I was better at munitions and communications and sharp shooting than Derek was and you sent_ him _instead of_ me _. I should have gone and you know it. You look me in the eyes and admit that you were wrong!”_

_Andrew shook his head curtly. “It was just a tragic accident. Completely unavoidable. His convoy hit a buried mine. I’m told it was quick.”_

_“What do you want me to tell Phillip and Jaime?”_

_“They’re boys, they’ll understand.”_

_Sharon took a deep breath. “They’re_ kids _, they need their father… if you’d sent me like you should have-”_

_“If I’d sent you they’d be without a mother, how would that be better?” Andrew snapped._

_“If you’d sent me I wouldn’t have taken the fucking convoy into a mine field!” Sharon raged, “Jesus Christ, that’s recon 101. You talk a big game about sending the right person to do the job no matter what but when it came right down to it you failed. You failed Derek and you failed me.”_

_“Don’t you speak to me like that, Commander. You may be my daughter but, goddamnit, I am still your superior officer and I will not have my actions second guessed by you. War is no place for a woman. I stand by that. Do you have any idea the amount of special changes would have to have been made to accommodate you? You couldn’t just bunk with the boys! It doesn’t just magically work because you think the sexes should be equal. You’d do best to remember that.”_

_“Sir, please leave my house before I do something I’ll really regret.” Sharon gritted her teeth._

_Andrew gave Sharon a long hard look before turning and leaving. Sharon slammed the door shut behind him. Her chest heaved but she did not cry._

_She went to the backdoor and saw her boys playing in the yard without a care in the world. She didn’t have to shatter that fantasy for them just yet, the least she could do was give them the afternoon to be boys before they had to learn about the pain of losing a parent._

_Sharon had a flashback to laying on the hospital bed with her mother, listening to the beep of the heart monitor as she worked in her math workbook, soothed by her mother’s soft breathing. She’d known for a long time that her mother was ill but her death had been no less painful. She couldn’t imagine what it would feel like to hear that_ suddenly _your world had been turned upside down._

_She wiped a tear away from her eyes and went to her study and sat down at her desk. There, she drafted a letter of resignation from the Navy. She wrote it in one go, read it over to make sure there were no mistakes and signed it. She folded it and stuffed it into an envelope and set it aside. She wouldn’t deliver it until the war was over._

_Sharon Raydor was no deserter._


	7. Chapter 7

Down in the kitchen again, hair fluffy and blown dry, Sharon walked over to the coffee pot. On her way over she noticed the blinking light on the answering machine and pressed the button as she started the coffee. 

“Captain, it’s about 0630 now and I’d like to take you to breakfast no later than 0800. When you get this message call me back.” 

Sharon looked at her watch and cursed under her breath. “Brenda!” She called up the stairs, “I hate to cut this short but I have to go.”

Brenda came down the stairs still towel drying her hair. “You’re kidding.” 

“I have to meet the admiral for breakfast.” Sharon said, a tremor of panic notable in her calm speech, “he said no later than 0800 and it’s almost 7:30 and I still have to finish dressing and get over to the hotel.”

“So he says jump and you say how high?” Brenda asked, following the flustered brunette back up the stairs.

“Pretty much.” 

“Where are you meeting for breakfast?”

“At his hotel.”

Brenda sighed, “how do you expect to get there? You remember I drove you home?” 

“Of course I remember, I can take a cab.” 

“You could have taken a cab last night but you didn’t, you asked me to drive you. So why don’t you let me drive you?” 

“Brenda, we’ll never make it.” Sharon snapped, her tone belying her anxiety. “You’re not even dresssed yet.” 

“Come on, he’s your father, he’ll forgive you if you’re a little late.” Brenda insisted, pulling on her clothes hastily as she tried to keep up with Sharon. 

Sharon let out a frustrated growl. Andrew Raydor considered punctuality to be the only reliable marker of good character. 

“Okay, let’s try this logic on for size: it’ll take a cab how long to get here? And see?, now I’m dressed! Now I can drive you and you’ll be fine.” Brenda put her hands on Sharon’s shoulders and guided her to the closet, “pick out your shoes and we’ll be all set.” 

**

In the car, Sharon didn’t seem to calm at all, which, in turn, made Brenda nervous. Brenda reached over and put her hand over Sharon’s knee. “Sharon, tell me a story.”

“About what?”

“I don’t care.” Brenda shrugged, “the first story that comes to mind.” 

Sharon sat back against the seat and lost herself in thought. 

“That’s not very quick, are you mentally sorting your stories?” Brenda asked. 

“No,” Sharon shook her head, “the first story that came to mind was about my mother… I haven’t thought about this in a while:

“My mother was a professor of literature at American University and sometimes my father would go on tours and I would stay behind and live just with her. I liked that a lot because I had more in common with my mother, not just because we were both women but because my father doesn’t ever open up so you’d never really know if you had anything in common with him. One night when my mother was tucking me into bed I told her how much I loved it when it was just she and I and I wished my father wouldn’t come back.” 

Brenda was silent. She gave Sharon a reassuring knee squeeze. 

Sharon sighed, not wanting to finish the story, not really knowing why she even started telling it. “My mother told me that it wasn’t a very nice thing to wish for because my father loved me. She told me she knew how hard it was, sometimes, to love him but that we had to make certain concessions for him.” Sharon rubbed her temple. “Not long after that my mother collapsed, she had a brain tumor and my father came back from a tour early. She had an operation and I spent all of my free time in her hospital room waiting for to wake up but she didn’t.” 

Sharon looked over at Brenda. “You don’t have to say anything. No one ever knows how to react to that story.” 

Brenda was mostly relieved that Sharon didn’t expect anything. That was a relief in a lot of ways. When Fritz had first asked her out she suspected that he had already envisioned spending his whole life with her. This time it would be Brenda who’d get to make that decision, it would be Brenda who would have to convince Sharon it was what they both wanted. 

Brenda smiled. “Thank you for sharing that with me.” 

Sharon looked over at Brenda and smiled slowly, “you’re welcome. Now you tell me a story.” 

“About anything in particular?” 

“You said you’ve dated women before. Tell me a story that elaborates on that.” 

Brenda nodded, “the first woman that I went out with was a friend of mine in high school. Her name was Catherine Delaney We were in calculus and French class together; after our midterm exams we went out for dinner. In retrospect it was a date but I don’t think we thought of it as one while we were on it. Neither of us had cars so we walked home and her house was on the way to mine and I walked her up to the front door and we started kissing. It’s one of those things where you can’t remember how it started, like your memory starts in the middle, then Catherine asked me if I wanted to come in… My heart was pounding and I was going to say yes but a light came on in her house and her mother called for her and then after that day we didn’t really talk anymore.” 

“That’s sad.” Sharon frowned, “why didn’t you tell a happy story?”

“Why didn’t you?”

“You told me to tell the first story that came to mind. I gave you a choice.” Sharon insisted, “tell me a good story.” 

“You have to tell me another story first.” Brenda said stubbornly. “I can’t imagine what it would have been like trying to date in high school when your father was a drill sergeant.” 

Sharon rolled her eyes, “he wasn’t a drill sergeant. He’s an admiral and you assume correctly that dating was a challenge for both of us. I was jailbait.” Sharon grinned, “I lived on a Naval base and there were other kids my age but there were also young recruits and the admiral tried to keep me from dating. When he finally realized he couldn’t he started picking boys he thought it was appropriate for me to date.” 

“Sharon, would it be offensive of me to tell you how creepy that is?” Brenda interrupted. 

Sharon snorted, “I would leave the house with the boys the admiral picked and but I’d go out on dates with the cadets.” 

“You rebel.” 

“I had so few things that were my decision.” Sharon looked over at Brenda, “I don’t want you to get the wrong impression, though. My father can be difficult to get along with because he’s always convinced that he’s right but I love him.” 

“Difficult to get along with… always convinced of rightness… geez, I don’t think I know anyone like that.” Brenda teased. 

“Oh shut up.” Sharon smirked. “I’m just saying he was never perfect but he never thought he’d end up being a single parent. He just did his best.” 

Brenda didn’t know what it was like to be a single parent and she didn’t pretend to but somehow she didn’t think that Sharon’s sons felt like there was anything they couldn’t tell her. Maybe she was wrong but she had the impression that Sharon was a very loving mother. 

Brenda pulled up in front of the hotel. Sharon looked at her watch before opening her door. “Hey,” Brenda called her back. “You’re forgetting something.” 

“Thank you,” Sharon leaned back in and kissed her on the lips.

“What about my date?” Brenda raised her eyebrows. 

“I’ll call you for dinner.”

“When?”

“Tonight?”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” Sharon kissed her again. “I really have to go, thanks again.” 

Brenda watched Sharon hasten to the doors and then slow to a normal pace as she passed through the entrance. Brenda had never seen the older woman hustle like that. She put the car back into drive and pulled away. 

Sharon approached the table and Andrew stood; Sharon and Andrew saluted each other. Smitty looked at the admiral and cursed himself for not realizing that he would stand for Sharon’s arrival and made an awkward gesture at saluting. 

Sharon took her seat, “I’m sorry I’m late.” The big clock visible behind Andrew was an annoying reminder that she was just over ten minutes late. “I was on my morning run when you called.” 

Andrew grunted disapprovingly, “Lawrence and I already ordered.” Lawrence Smith, who had preferred Smitty since he was ten, looked up at Sharon apologetically. “If you’ll excuse me for a minute.” 

Once Andrew was out of ear shot Smitty leaned in, “I tried to get him to wait. I ordered you a coffee.” 

“It’s okay, it was my fault.” Sharon picked up the menu. “How’d you get roped into this?”

Smitty shrugged, “I’m staying here too. He knocked on my door at five thirty.” 

“Entertaining any lady friends?” 

Smitty laughed, “nah, you took the hottest blond with you when you left and you were the hottest brunette so after that it was pretty slim pickings.” He sipped his coffee, “so no, no lady friends, but I was hugging the toilet for dear life. I ordered the greasiest thing on the menu. How are you feeling this morning?”

“Can’t complain.” 

“Wanna tell me about her?”

“No.”

“Come on!” Smitty grinned, “whatever happened to bros before hos? We always share stories!” 

“Not when the admiral is within ear shot so stow it, sailor.” 

Smitty laughed, “we’ll talk later.”

“ _Maybe_. God, you’re such a lech.” Sharon closed the menu, “I don’t know if I feel like eating. My stomach’s all knots. He’s going to be difficult all morning.” 

Andrew returned and a waitress came by to bring Andrew and Smitty’s breakfasts and to take Sharon’s order. Sharon knew better than to bother the admiral while he was eating. She was tired of walking on egg shells around her father, fifty plus years and she still let her father push her buttons. 

The waitress came to collect the empty plates and Sharon asked to have the rest of hers wrapped. 

Sitting at the table with nothing but coffee, Sharon took a silent breath. “How was your evening, sir?” 

“Fine, thank you, Captain.” Andrew sipped his coffee, “and yours?”

“Good.” Sharon nodded, “I was thinking that today you might like to see some of the sights. The museum has a pre-raphaelite exhibit that you might like.” 

“Yes, Captain, that sounds nice, thank you.” 

“Smitty, are you available for a trip to the museum this afternoon?” Sharon turned to ask. 

“Afraid not,” Smitty shook his head, “I have a flight to catch and I should probably get going now. I’ll give you a twenty for breakfast, should cover mine.” 

“Commander, put your wallet away, that’s an order. I’m treating.” Andrew waved him off. 

“Well, thank you, sir.” Smitty stood and Sharon followed. They embraced the way old friends do, two people who have been through hell and back. They turned and kissed each other’s cheeks, Smitty gave Sharon a squeeze. “It was good to see you, Shark, don’t let so much time pass next time, huh?” 

“Do my best.” Sharon smiled and watched him walk away before taking her seat. 

“What about Lawrence, Captain?”

Sharon furrowed her brow, “what _about_ him?”

“You two have always been close, you trained together. You worked together a lot before you were promoted to officer. That’s a very close bond, if you don’t trust your crewmates you can’t trust anyone.” Andrew looked up at Sharon and noted her pursed lips. “Don’t give me that look, I know that you two had an affair.”

“Sir!” Sharon exclaimed, always hating when he talked about her sex life. It wasn’t that she felt like she couldn’t have a real conversation about love and relationships with her father, it was that he discussed it like battle strategy. 

“After Derek died and Lawrence came home and his marriage fell apart. Don’t bother trying to deny it.” 

“I’m not _denying_ it, it’s not a secret. I’m not ashamed of it-”

“His C.O. came to me. He was afraid that you were a bad influence, that you would encourage Lawrence to jump ship. I told him to leave it alone, you two needed each other, you loved each other.” 

“Sir, please.” Sharon shook her head, “yes, I love him, he’s my best friend, but I’m not _in_ love with him and I’ve told you time and time again to stop trying to pick my men for me. I don’t understand why you won’t leave it alone. You stopped for years why start up again now?” 

“I just want you to be taken care of.”

“I don’t need to be taken care of.” Sharon scowled, “I just got a commendation from the city of Los Angeles for _taking care_ of hundreds of citizens. I raised two children on my own who grew into strong and capable young men, I think I have proven that I am capable.” 

“I didn’t say you weren’t capable. I just think you need someone to support you; someone to take care of you when you need it.” 

The waitress came back with Sharon’s wrapped food and the check, temporarily halting the Raydors’ conversation. Andrew tucked cash into the folder and handed it back. “Keep the change.”

“Thank you, sir.” The waitress smiled. 

“Shall we, Captain?” Andrew stood up and Sharon did too. The conversation temporarily tabled the two Raydors walked from the hotel to Sharon’s car that was still in the LAPD parking garage. It was about four blocks away from the hotel and it was a nice day for a walk. 

Sharon’s hands were stuffed into the pockets of her Armani suit jacket and her eyes were cast down at the sidewalk. Sharon very rarely felt like she had nothing to say but Andrew Raydor’s presence commanded silence and she couldn’t bring herself to break it. 

They’d made it a block from the hotel before Andrew said, “you’ll at least think about what I said? About Lawrence?”

Sharon sighed and stopped walking, faced her father and set her features in a steely glare. “Just stop. Okay? _Stop_. I’m sorry I’m not living my life to your exact specifications but you’re not going to berate me into remarrying. I am 56 years old and I make my own decisions. You don’t have to accept it but you do have to live with it.” Sharon let out a frustrated growl, “we see each other – what? Once or twice a year? – and the only thing you can think of to talk to me about is how I should be in a relationship? We can’t talk about my job? What I’m doing in my free time? Are you seeing anyone? How’re Jaime and Phillip? You drive me up the wall, Admiral. I always look forward to seeing you but somehow it’s always disappointing and it always makes me feel bad.” 

Sharon waited for him to say something back and when he didn’t she turned to keep walking. 

“Sharon!” He called out after her, hoarsely. 

She whipped around and her heart stopped for a moment when she saw her father collapsed on the ground, holding his arm. “Oh god,” she whispered, running back to him. She got down on her knees in front of him and took his hand. 

“This is Captain Sharon Raydor. My father’s having a heart attack, we’re on the corner of South Figueroa Street and Broad Street, I need a bus _now_.” She threw down her phone and focused her attentions on Andrew. “You’re okay, you’re going to be fine.” 

He clasped his hand around hers. “Sharon, I love you. I need to say a few things.” 

“Plenty of time for that later. Save your strength.”

“No, there’s no more time.” Andrew insisted, “I love you with my whole being, Sharon, you’re the most important thing in the world to me. I just never knew out how to love you. You always seemed so far away from me.”

“All I ever wanted was for you to be proud of me…” Sharon admitted. 

Andrew reached up and touched Sharon’s face. “I’ve always been proud of you.” 

“You told me not to join the Navy… that really hurt my feelings. The Navy was so important to you and you didn’t want me to be a part of it.”

“I wanted you to do anything but the Navy. I was afraid to lose you. I knew you’d be too good at it. I never would have sent you to war, I’d’ve personally gone in your place before I sent you into combat. You had to know that.”

Sharon pressed her eyes shut, “I thought you didn’t believe in me.”

“Sharon,” he whispered, stroking her hair, “you’re the strongest, most amazing person I’ve ever known. The things you’ve gone through, the things you’ve accomplished… you can do anything, I’ve always known that. You need someone to support you-”

“Admiral!” Sharon protested, unable to believe he was still on that. 

“Someone who’ll never let you forget how special you are. Someone who’ll love you and appreciate you. Sometimes you forget what you’re capable of, sometimes your humility gets in your way. You need someone to tell you to shut up and enjoy the accolades. I regret that I didn’t tell you enough.” 

“Shh,” Sharon laid her head on his shoulder. “Don’t say that. You’re going to be fine.” 

**

Brenda was seated on her couch reading a report from Tao when the phone rang. She picked it up and put it between her ear and her shoulder. “Chief Johnson.” 

“Hi…” Sharon said with uncertainty. 

Brenda sat up, “oh, Captain, I wasn’t expecting to hear from you so soon.” She looked at the clock, it was still only just before three. 

“Yeah…” Sharon bit her lip, “about dinner… I’m going to have to postpone…” 

“Oh.” Brenda frowned. Trying not to reveal how disappointed she was, she added, “may I ask why?”

“I…” Sharon let out a shaky breath. “My father just died…”


	8. Chapter 8

Brenda was speechless. The report fell from her lap and she sat forward on the couch, mouth agape. She wanted to say something but couldn’t find any words. 

“I’m just sitting here at the Getty in front of a Titian…” Sharon said slowly, “it’s called Penitent Magdelene… Mary Magdelene is lifting her eyes toward heaven…” 

Still, Brenda was speechless. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I called you. I don’t need to burden you with this.” Sharon closed her eyes against fresh tears and wiped her eyes. “I’m taking a few weeks compassionate leave… I have to go to Virginia to take care of his estate… I’ll call you when I get back.” 

Brenda blinked, “Captain, wait.” There was only silence on the other end. Sharon had hung up. After a few moments of stunned stillness she called Sharon back and the call was dumped straight to voicemail. 

Brenda knew immediately that she had failed that conversation. She should have said something, she should have been supportive and instead she’d said nothing and she proved to Sharon that she had nothing to offer. If you couldn’t call upon the person you’re dating in a time of need then what was the point? Brenda cursed her own failure and tried to decide what to do. 

**

It was Smitty who greeted Sharon at the airport. She saw him, he looked at her with wet, red eyes, he felt for her and felt his own loss. Andrew had taken a special interest in Smitty when he’d realized how close he and Sharon were and now there was an obvious void. 

Sharon felt her eyes well up with tears again and he moved to embrace her. She clutched him and cried into his shoulder. He cupped the back of her head and choked back tears of his own; it tore him apart to see Sharon so sad. 

She pulled back and steeled herself, “alright, Smitty, this is what we’re going to do. We’re going to get groceries and a bottle of Jack and go to the Admiral’s house and we’re going to eat, drink and make some vain attempt at being merry.” Sharon sighed. “You got that?”

“Got it.” He nodded, “it’s your party, Shark.” 

**

The phone ringing at midnight woke her up. She reached for her cell phone and succeeded in knocking it off the night stand. She yawned and curled back into her blankets, deciding not to wrestle with the phone. Whoever it was could leave her a message if it was important. 

“ _You’ve reached the voicemail box of Brenda Leigh Johnson, please leave your name, number and a brief message and I’ll get back to y’all soon as I can._ ” 

The phone beeped and Sharon hesitated for a moment. “Hi Chief… it’s me… I don’t know why I’m calling… it’s just… it’s almost four in the morning and I’m hung over and for some insane reason I miss you.” There was a long pause, “Phillip’s coming over first thing in the morning… they’re not sure if Jaime’s going to make it back in time for the funeral… I just… I don’t know, I don’t feel like there’s anything stable I can hang onto anymore.” 

**

Brenda sat behind the wheel of the car and listened to the message again. She sighed and closed her eyes before dialing another number. 

“Hello?” He answered. 

“Hi. Hello… Fritz, it’s me… I know I shouldn’t be calling you like this… but you’re the closest thing I’ve had to a friend in a long time.” 

The separation had been mostly amicable. Fritz acknowledged that he still loved her but for his own sanity couldn’t be with her. He’d met someone at the FBI and they’d flirted and skirted around starting a relationship until Fritz told Brenda that they were over. Brenda was sad but not surprised and got over it quickly. The thing she missed most about Fritz was dinner being ready when she got home from work. 

“What’s up, Brenda?”

“I’ve sort of been seeing someone… it’s hard for me to explain because we haven’t been on any dates but we’ve, uh, slept together a couple of times.” 

“Okay.” Fritz nodded, “I’m with you so far.”

“It’s Sharon Raydor.” 

Fritz was silent for a moment, processing, “alright, go on.” 

“So, we’re not that close, right? But her father just died and she came to Virginia to deal with his affairs and she left me this voicemail that was… _so sad_ and I… put in for vacation time and grabbed a flight to Dulles. I’m sitting in my rental car asking myself what I’m doing here.” Brenda let out a breath, “I’ve never been this impulsive. Is this too forward? Would she even want to see me right now?” 

Fritz processed this information for a moment and said, “let me answer that with another question. When was the last time you took vacation time.” 

Brenda stopped to think, “our honeymoon.” 

“How much coercing did it take for you to pick a date and take the time off?”

“I don’t know!” Brenda scowled. 

“Months, Brenda. It took you months and months to set a date to marry me. I should have known then that it wasn’t what you wanted and you should know now that this is what you want. You got on a plane and took time off for her. Doesn’t that tell you something?”

Brenda nodded slowly, “it does.” She bit her lip, “it means I’m already really hung up on Sharon Raydor. What if she doesn’t want me here?”

“You’re already there. Worst she can do is ask you to leave.” Fritz shrugged, “either way, I’m sure it’ll mean a lot to her that you’re there.” 

“Thank you, Fritz.” 

“You’re welcome, Brenda.” 

The call with Fritz ended she turned to the GPS, passively mocking her from the dash. “Alright, how do you work?”

**

Sharon sat in the kitchen with Phillip going through a box of Andrew’s papers when the doorbell rang. 

“I’ll get it, mom.” Phillip said, he put a hand on his mother’s shoulder and she gave it a gentle squeeze. 

Phillip opened the door to see Brenda standing on the stoop. She was temporarily stunned at seeing Phillip, he was tall and broad shouldered and strikingly handsome. She had seen his picture and had become aware that being extremely attractive was the Raydor family curse but she still had not been adequately prepared. “Hi…” she started, “I’m Brenda Leigh Johnson, you must be one of Sharon’s boys.”

“Yes, ma’am.” He nodded. “I’m Lieutenant Phillip Raydor.”

“I’m sorry about your grandfather.” 

“Thank you, ma’am.” 

“Is your mother around?” Brenda asked, hoping to keep the nervousness out of her voice. 

“She’s in the kitchen, would you like to come in?” He stood aside and bid her enter. 

“Yes, thank you,” Brenda gripped the heavy plastic bag and followed him into the kitchen. 

Sharon looked up and blinked a few times in surprise. “Chief Johnson…” Sharon stood from the table and looked into Brenda’s face as though deciding if she were real. “What are you doing here?” 

“Dinner.” Brenda hauled the heavy bag onto the tabletop. “You haven’t eaten have you? I figured you’d be too distracted to cook.” 

“That’s…” Sharon smiled a little, “very sweet, thank you.” 

The two women shared a long languid look before Sharon shook herself out, “oh, I’m sorry, Phillip, this is my Chief Johnson- I mean my friend Chief Brenda- I mean--” 

“It’s okay, mom, we did this at the door.” He turned to Brenda, “can I get you something to drink, ma’am? My mother and I were having sweet tea.” 

“That sounds lovely, thank you.” 

“I’ll get plates.” Sharon moved toward the cabinets. 

Brenda put gentle hands on her shoulders and guided her back to the table. “Just sit and relax, Sharon. I’ll set the table.” 

Sharon, unable to sit still and let herself be taken care of to save her life, started to unpack the food. “I love Chadwick’s.” Sharon said with a twinge of nostalgia. 

“I hope I picked good things. I thought about calling but I wanted it to be a surprise.” Brenda set three plates on the table and the silverware clanged on top. “I made some executive decisions. A ribeye for Phillip.” 

“Thank you, ma’am.” Phillip accepted the container with surprise. “It’s perfect.” 

“Sharon, I got you the salmon with a ceasar salad.” Brenda held the container up. Sharon watched it for a moment and took it from her. 

“What did you get for you?” 

“I got buttermilk fried chicken.” Brenda licked her lips subconsciously. 

“This was very thoughtful.” Sharon reached over and took Brenda’s hand. Brenda turned her hand in Sharon’s and gave it a gentle squeeze. 

Phillip glanced at the hand holding and the look that passed between the women before starting in on his dinner. They ate in silence and when dinner was finished, leftovers were put away and Brenda and Phillip did the dishes. 

“Brenda, can we talk?” Sharon asked softly. 

“I’ll go up to the attic and see if there are any more boxes of paperwork.” Phillip offered, taking it as a cue to leave. 

Sharon kept her eyes on the table for a few long moments. “Why did you come?” 

Brenda shrugged, “I don’t know exactly… I asked myself the same thing… I just felt compelled to, I listened to the voicemail you left me and I didn’t think there was any question of where I should be.” 

Tears slid down Sharon’s cheeks and she reached up and covered her eyes. 

“I’m not asking anything of you, I don’t expect anything.” Brenda inched closer, “I’m just here for you. I’m just a shoulder to cry on, a friend to call on. This is me, sitting in this kitchen, not expecting anything from you.” 

Sharon took her hand away from her face and studied Brenda’s face for a few moments. “I’ll make us some coffee.” 

“Thank you.” 

Sharon set a metal tea pot on one of the burners and turned back to Brenda. She leaned down and kissed her softly. Brenda slipped her eyes shut, she touched Sharon’s cheek as their lips grazed, Sharon’s lips murmuring gently against Brenda’s.


End file.
